Ian: I just opened a pack of bacon with one of my Samurai swords
G: What?!?! Why did you do that?
Ian: To see if I could do it
G: Mate, you’re still drunk from last night
Ian: Ah, fair point
The morning after
You're reading it – so you're partially guilty…
Filth, lies, truth and blame 
I hope you made the appropriate samurai noises whilst opening said bacon!
I did, they were a little like the noise Miss Piggy makes when she does a karate chop.
[Smiles to himself at cleverness of Miss Piggy sounds for opening a packet of bacon]
It’s because you couldn’t find a “knife”, yes? 🙂
That would be my excellently self-referential answer, however – no, I just decided, like some mad scientist, to see if it was possible to open a packet of bacon using nothing more than a common, everyday 26 inch-bladed Samurai sword. The kind we all have lying around the house in case we need to help Hiro Nakamura or kill Bill.
The conclusion drawn from the experiment was: “Yes. You can.”
I am conflicted whether to use the katana or the wakazashi at breakfast. Avoiding the dilemma, I have resorted to my tanto. Wakarimasuka?
Hai, wakarimasu. Toire wa doko desu ka? 😉
Shurimasen. Misete kudasai.
Uh… Where has all the English gone??
Welcome to Japanese 101. The English class is down the corridor, second door on the left.
I suspect that Lisa is no less confused than the average Japanese on the street would be.
Oyasuminasai. Dewa kore de.
I seem to have wandered in to an alternate universe where the spoken language is Japanese and swords are the devices used for opening packages of food.
I may go back to bed now and hope that everything has recovered when I wake up again.
Bulldog – it’s working, the normal people are running away now. 🙂
Brennig – welcome to our universe, formal evening wear is optional, soup of the day is smoked elephant and noodle. Your waitress tonight will be Anne.
Next lesson: Nunchaku and scrambled eggs . . .
Now class, did everyone hand in last week’s assignment: Yakusa toast-making and the art of ninja coffee?
I’m afraid I’m still working on the peach tea concept. 🙂
Has everyone here overdosed on Kill Bill?
Silly Caucasian man likes to play with Samurai swords…. ;o)
You have *obviously* never watched Heroes.
*obviously* you’re right… :o)
But do I get any points for owning every episode of ‘Kung Fu’ on DVD? ;o)
Ahhh… Master Po
If you can snatch the pebble from my hand, you may leave the temple. 😉
@puntuation re the miss piggy noise – omg i nearly wee’d!!!
(Konnichiwa, Ian).
Did you throw the packet of bacon into the air, reach down to your sword in a blur, and then watch 4 rashers land on the pan in perfect array?
Because that’s the way to do it, I reckon.
You should be wearing black when you did this. It’s cooler. (Fashion-wise, not thermodynamically).
That’s exactly how it went, and I trimmed the rind and extra fat off the bacon at the same time…I’m *that* much of a Ninja! 😉
Hayaa!
(laughing here)
next you’ll be telling us you’ve been using a sledgehammer to tenderize things…
M