The Dead Hooker metric

I’m going to propose a new standard performance metric¬†called¬†“The Dead Hooker Metric”.

This is especially for management agents of properties for let and specifically for those that manage group properties like apartment estates and so on.

It’s as simple as this:

If you fail to notice, in a reasonable time, a dead hooker* lying somewhere about the property you manage then you are not, in fact, managing the property but instead performing some other indeterminate function for which you were not hired.

* It doesn’t have to be a dead hooker (despite the occupation’s higher than average mortality rate) – it could be any other out-of-the-ordinary event such as several broken bottles scattered in a perfect tire-puncturing array precisely emulating police stop-sticks.