Catch me in the Theatre District Milton Keynes all day tomorrow plus the Main Stage in Middleton Hall and on the Fringe Stage at Midsummer Place from about 1pm. I will also be by “the statues” outside the Theatre and Milton Keynes Art Gallery and you’ll also see my poems and work written all over the pavements around The MK Theatre District.
Specially for my fellow bloggers here’s one of my poems currently not on the website (note to Americans – me being an Englishman obviously means that “pants” here refers to underpants/knickers/undercrackers).
(with apologies to Dr. Seuss)
Give back my pants you evil swine,
give the pants back, the pants are mine.
I’ve got none left but the woolly pants
and they are the itchy ones that itch like ants.
I’ve got eight socks and they are all odd
except for the two with the holes, you
and the pair with flowers that make me look
give my pants back, give them back today.
What do you do with my underwear,
when you snaffle my pants to your secret lair?
Do they sit on your head like a panty hat
or do you cuddle them in bed like a panty cat?
do they fly on a pole like a panty flag?
GIVE MY PANTS BACK, YOU MAKE ME MAD!
Do you think it’s funny to take just one of each?
Do you stretch them out as towels on monster beach?
Or do you go to visit sock monster camp
and sleep in my sock
and stay out of the damp?
I’ve been searching high and low,
I’m ten minutes late and I’ve got to go.
Give my socks back, don’t you care?
I can’t go out with one foot bare!